Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize