So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
You brought string cheese to the strip club
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
