haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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