i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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