Welp...herpes.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
