dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
