He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
