My friends, they love my intelligence
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
