drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
