Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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