i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
