My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Vodka?
Forever.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
