It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
