I just saw a hot homeless man
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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