The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
a search helicopter?!
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
