i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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