I'm going to jail i love you
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
