i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Is it because I queefed?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
