hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
