I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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