hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize