In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize