your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
