so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Just high enough for therapy.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
