So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
