please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Randomize
