Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
