evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
