Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Dick very happy bro
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
