Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
