My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
