I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
