To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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