Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
