Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Randomize
