after a month anything with tits is on the radar
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I think people are normalizing furries
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize