Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
