who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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