About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize