Christians are straight up FREAKS
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
