if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize