I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
