Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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