i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
