I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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