She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I supernannyed him into submission
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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