just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
