you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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