Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize