she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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