I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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