me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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